BEING A FAMILY CAREGIVER

Caring for a loved one can be complicated and contradictory.  It is often described as a stressful and exhausting role that can take a toll on the caregiver's physical and emotional health.  At the same time, it can be rewarding, important and highly treasured.  There is research supporting both of these perspectives.  Furthermore, I believe most family caregivers experience a wide range of thoughts and feelings, and there are numerous individual factors that determine how well they cope with the experience.  

I've provided some practical ideas and a few of my favorite resources.  Two thoughts that I find helpful:

• Your stresses are neither your fault nor your loved one’s fault, but are caused by the situation or illness. 
• Focus on these phrases: "I am both a caregiver and a person with my own needs" and "I take care of both my loved one and myself." 

Seven Suggestions for Taking Care of the Family Caregiver

1) Understand the diagnosis: the anticipated disease process, the interventions, and how it impacts other medical conditions.    

 2) Encourage the doctors and other professionals to communicate directly with your loved one.  

3) Share what is going on with family and friends.   

4) Be specific about the type of help you need, whether or not it directly involves your loved one. 

5) Follow guidelines for good health:

• balanced diet
• exercise or other physical movement
• enough sleep; most adults need between 7 and 9 hours
• avoid smoking, excessive drinking of alcohol, or using drugs/overuse of medications
• keep your mind challenged
• socialize with supportive people
• learn and use relaxation techniques
• find ways to laugh, or at least smile 

6) Accept and respect your limitations and set reasonable expectations with your loved one. 

7) Let go of guilt feelings. 

These suggestions are part of a presentation I have given.  If you would like to arrange a talk or workshop, please feel free to CONTACT me.

Also, if you would benefit from learning how to implement such information, with consideration of your specific needs, please CONTACT me for an individual or family consultation or psychotherapy.

RECOMMENDED BOOKS:

Alzheimer’s: A Caregiver’s Guide and Sourcebook by Howard Gruetzner; Wiley, Third Edition (2001)

Ten Thousand Joys & Ten Thousand Sorrows: A Couple's Journey Through Alzheimer's by Olivia Ames Hoblitzelle; Tarcher, Reprint edition (2010)

RECOMMENDED WEBSITES:

Family Caregiver Alliance: www.caregiver.org

Alzheimer's Association: www.alz.org